DGM 191: *bawls*
Feb. 3rd, 2010 01:40 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
a1y_puff(Yes, I know this icon is overused but I LOVE IT and it fits with my rambling anyway XD)
My reaction towards DGM 191 in general: Kandaaaaaaa~! *tears up*
This chapter is awesome. Heartwarming and heartbreaking all at once. I teared up just into the first few pages ;__;
So, the opening scene. Kanda standing on the ruins, looking up at the sky with a rather solemn face, seeing 'blue, as far as the eyes can see'. And then the next page he began to tear up and there was this image of Alma with blood and an expression of shock/something and 'Yuu' cried and said "Sorry, Alma, sorry."
And I teared up right there and then.
So, then the flashback came, with Kanda having quite a dream with a bloody hand that didn't belong to him. I was like, 'What kind of morbid dream is that?'
The part where he and Alma went to greet the 'others that haven't awaken' was cute and sweet and somewhat sad tho it was funny seeing Alma and Kanda's conversation about 'the guy named Winter' (I wonder what Kanda thought when he'd known that Winter is a season, but turned out there IS a guy named 'Winter Socalo'--or however you spell his name XD)
I nearly cried when they were about to 'put Yuu back to sleep' by freezing him and was all WTF PEOPLE, HOW COULD YOU?! D:
And--and! Alma carrying Yuu to escape...and then get shot by those crows and Alma was all smiley and said 'if you get lucky, maybe you could get outside?' and how he told Yuu to just 'run'.... That was.. GAH!
And, and, OH MARIE AND BAK! *hearts*
I seriously love Marie here, for some reason. I just loved it when he gently picked Yuu up and remove the arrow-thingy and Yuu went 'this smell is familiar...' and he'd later identify as the smell of blood and death... *tears up*
I was reminded that one time when Marie told Allen how he and Kanda are similar--that the darkness within them ran deep, he didnt know how to pull them out of it.)
And the whole core memories+dreams+mysterious woman things!
I'm pretty sure when the one who loves 'that woman' is the original person who was based to breed the 2nd exorcists (I guess).
So now Kanda is posessing memories of someone else. Much like Allen, anyone?
Don't you think the list of similarities between Allen and Kanda keeps growing?
1. They're both cursed.
2. They see things that shouldn't be there (the flowers vs shadow in the mirrors).
3. They have a 'time limit' to live.
4. 'The darkness within', as how Marie put it.
5. How little!Allen actually behaved like Kanda, and now this...
6. They are implanted with memories of someone else, though kind of done differently.
HOSHINO. WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO SAY?
Aaaand... Where is Allen, for god's sake, I wanna see his reaction! *tears hair in frustration*
Mou... But anyway. Now we know why Kanda keeps his distance with everyone, but still looking out for his 'comrades'. Maybe it's his regrets regarding Alma--that he couldn't save him and ended up having to kill him, what's more), and maybe this similarities between Alma and Allen, and Allen and himself was too much that he can't stand Allen.
I imagine how pissed Kanda must've been when he found out about Allen being the host for the 14th's memories. And now that I know he also has memories that don't belong to him...and how he dismissed Allen with an 'I don't care' when they were on a mission with Miranda and Allen thinking it's because he's hosting the 14th that Kanda was more on edge.. Which probably true, after all, but for an entirely different reason than merely disgusted by the Noah.
Allen reminded Kanda of himself AND Alma. That must be.... Ugh.
But anyway. Maybe it's just me. I'm sorry if I don't make sense XD
But yeah. This chapter is so AWESOME!
My reaction towards DGM 191 in general: Kandaaaaaaa~! *tears up*
This chapter is awesome. Heartwarming and heartbreaking all at once. I teared up just into the first few pages ;__;
So, the opening scene. Kanda standing on the ruins, looking up at the sky with a rather solemn face, seeing 'blue, as far as the eyes can see'. And then the next page he began to tear up and there was this image of Alma with blood and an expression of shock/something and 'Yuu' cried and said "Sorry, Alma, sorry."
And I teared up right there and then.
So, then the flashback came, with Kanda having quite a dream with a bloody hand that didn't belong to him. I was like, 'What kind of morbid dream is that?'
The part where he and Alma went to greet the 'others that haven't awaken' was cute and sweet and somewhat sad tho it was funny seeing Alma and Kanda's conversation about 'the guy named Winter' (I wonder what Kanda thought when he'd known that Winter is a season, but turned out there IS a guy named 'Winter Socalo'--or however you spell his name XD)
I nearly cried when they were about to 'put Yuu back to sleep' by freezing him and was all WTF PEOPLE, HOW COULD YOU?! D:
And--and! Alma carrying Yuu to escape...and then get shot by those crows and Alma was all smiley and said 'if you get lucky, maybe you could get outside?' and how he told Yuu to just 'run'.... That was.. GAH!
And, and, OH MARIE AND BAK! *hearts*
I seriously love Marie here, for some reason. I just loved it when he gently picked Yuu up and remove the arrow-thingy and Yuu went 'this smell is familiar...' and he'd later identify as the smell of blood and death... *tears up*
I was reminded that one time when Marie told Allen how he and Kanda are similar--that the darkness within them ran deep, he didnt know how to pull them out of it.)
And the whole core memories+dreams+mysterious woman things!
I'm pretty sure when the one who loves 'that woman' is the original person who was based to breed the 2nd exorcists (I guess).
So now Kanda is posessing memories of someone else. Much like Allen, anyone?
Don't you think the list of similarities between Allen and Kanda keeps growing?
1. They're both cursed.
2. They see things that shouldn't be there (the flowers vs shadow in the mirrors).
3. They have a 'time limit' to live.
4. 'The darkness within', as how Marie put it.
5. How little!Allen actually behaved like Kanda, and now this...
6. They are implanted with memories of someone else, though kind of done differently.
HOSHINO. WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO SAY?
Aaaand... Where is Allen, for god's sake, I wanna see his reaction! *tears hair in frustration*
Mou... But anyway. Now we know why Kanda keeps his distance with everyone, but still looking out for his 'comrades'. Maybe it's his regrets regarding Alma--that he couldn't save him and ended up having to kill him, what's more), and maybe this similarities between Alma and Allen, and Allen and himself was too much that he can't stand Allen.
I imagine how pissed Kanda must've been when he found out about Allen being the host for the 14th's memories. And now that I know he also has memories that don't belong to him...and how he dismissed Allen with an 'I don't care' when they were on a mission with Miranda and Allen thinking it's because he's hosting the 14th that Kanda was more on edge.. Which probably true, after all, but for an entirely different reason than merely disgusted by the Noah.
Allen reminded Kanda of himself AND Alma. That must be.... Ugh.
But anyway. Maybe it's just me. I'm sorry if I don't make sense XD
But yeah. This chapter is so AWESOME!
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2010-02-03 02:23 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-02-03 02:59 pm (UTC)You are so going to go to my blacklist. Just a warning.
With hate,
Fia
---------------
I LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE THIS CHAPTER ;__;
The opening scene is REAL heartbreaking. ;A;
Then it suddenly turned to be creepy, followed with funny convos between Alma and Kanda.
Hoshino, you really love toying with your readers' emotions don't you? And you are doing a great job on it, grats.
And Alma... Alma is so sweet... ;___; I can't really describe him with other words...
ALLEN, YOU NEED TO APPEAR SOON DARN YOU D:
And Marie also wins my heart in this chapter. His moment with Kanda is just AWWWWWWWWWW <3
AND I totally agree with you. Kanda is becoming more and more similar to Allen. THEY ARE TWO HALVES OF A SOUL, ADMIT IT GUYS *SHOT*
Lastly... WHY THE CRUEL TWO MONTHS WAIT? WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY? ;A;
no subject
Date: 2010-02-03 03:16 pm (UTC)Hawhaw, campur2 de ni chapter. Lucu, sweet, cute, and sediiiiih T.T
Harhar...
no subject
Date: 2010-02-03 03:38 pm (UTC)ME TOOOO! If only it had more Allen, it would've been perfect ;__;
I knooooow right? Just looking at Yuu's crying face made my heart twist. Just... Ugh!
Alma in this chapter is just...so....I have no words. Oh, alma... But I still don't want him stealing Kanda from Allen XD
AND YES, ALLEN, WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU? Hawhaw...
Marie is love. He needs more love <3
AND YES THEY ARE SOULMATE! *bricked bricked bricked*
And it's only a month, right? April issue is out in March, ne?
no subject
Date: 2010-02-03 04:33 pm (UTC)Yes, we need Allen. ;___;
True, though the first thing that passed on my mind when I see him crying is "Holy-- this guy is still so pretty when crying. <3". *SHOT*
I'm melting a bit for Alma, but still... Allen is the only one for Kanda to me. ;__;
GET OUT NOW
Yes, indeed he is. <3
OF COURSE 8DDD
....................... I keep forgetting that it's February already. orz
FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIL *JUMPS OFF A CLIFF*
no subject
Date: 2010-02-03 04:55 pm (UTC)Yesss. I dun want Alma to wake up if he's gonna steal kanda xp
XD. Be glad that the wait would only be for a month XD
no subject
Date: 2010-02-03 05:57 pm (UTC)SAAAAAAAAAAAAAME
I can wait for a month. xD
no subject
Date: 2010-02-04 02:10 pm (UTC)If people ask me what my thoughts about this chapter is, I'd just link them here, because all I can say is
MIND READEROMG I AGREE SO MUCH.asdfghjkl
You wrote it down much clearer than I would have, bb. ♥ And oooh, I can't help but wibble for Kanda, because guh, my favorite character is so pretty and broken and asdfghjkl omg!
And shota!Kanda is turning me to a shotacon! *gets shot*
Kanda's "I love you" is most probably from his "original memories" but it doesn't really deter me from going hnnnnghyessss LOL
/insane Kanda fangirl moment ♥ Guuuh, Hoshino-sensei finally gave us the much-awaited Kanda Arc! *flails*
no subject
Date: 2010-02-04 02:19 pm (UTC)obsessed fangirls'great minds think alike? XDI KNOOOW RIIITE? Didn't this chappy just made you wanna huggle him? >w< *flails*
Yes, it's probably his core memory talking BUT IT STILL COMES OUT OF YUU'S MOUTH! *shot shot*
Hehe. A friend of mine cropped that frame and add 'Allen' after the words 'I love you' XD
no subject
Date: 2010-02-04 02:27 pm (UTC)W-well, I did a mental addition of 'Allen' after the 'I love you' hahahahaha. I can't wait for it to be animated (OVAs please please pleaseeee)! :DDD
Kanda being all cute and asdfghjkl is enough to turn my mind to goo *__* Oh, and Marie was so sweet in this chapter! And Bak looks so cute when he's young (well, he's cute now too, so cuter! hahaha)
Okay I'm just rambling~♪
no subject
Date: 2010-02-04 03:05 pm (UTC)Yeeeesss! Marie was just love! And I want to ship brotherly love of Marie/Kanda. But just brotherly! XD
I now want a Yullen fic from Marie's perspective... Harhar...
Bak is just awesome like that :p
And that's fine, rambling is a fangirl's job XD
no subject
Date: 2010-02-05 05:35 am (UTC)Didn't I tell you, Ali-chan? That this chapter was utterly sad and adorable and GUHHHH
*dead*
My heart goes out to Kanda. Seriously. My throat closed on a great lump of tears and sobs when I saw those first scenes, with Kanda looking at the blue skies.
His tears and his thoughts, for the first time this boy was looking at te sky, and anyway...he still felt horribly sad.
'I knew I would hate it'
Sky, with its freedom and joy and loveliness, and Yuu the toy and tool from the Order's "fruitless garden for God", the second apostle project.
The name "Kanda" is so apt and sad and rebellious, if we look it in that perspective.
From that beginning, I knew the chapter would be hell. For a moment there I thought Alma's funny antics would bring down the angsty feelings, but MY GOODNESS not even a horde of clowns could have stopped my feelings of anguish and compassion for this update.
I grow to admire Kanda more and more and more.
And the mysteries continue. Those memories, are they from the "Kanda" before the experiments, and thus this implies that Kanda used to be a child who was killed by an akuma, in front of that woman?
I get confused. The memories are from Kanda's view, or from the woman's point of view?
Anyway, I think that the more revelations we are presented with, we will discover that the Order did a truly nasty thing with those boys. Genetically altered, killed time and time again for the sake of trial and error, memory implants or erasure, etc etc.
And still Kanda, he fights so damn hard so that no one has to go through what he lived. He would rather die a dozens times, before letting the others and even Allen a with his hero complex, suffer more than what they already do.
Also the last image, with Kanda awakening in the lab table, his hand reaching upwards, and his words..."I love you".
GUHH. I wanted to die right then.
But I keep wondering if this is a play on the words "ai" as in love, and "ai" as in a name, the woman's name?
OHHH chapter upddate, please hurry up!!!
*ficcies are much welcomed and needed and Ali-chan, lets fangirl over Kanda moreeee*
no subject
Date: 2010-02-06 01:39 am (UTC)I knooow, I really want to huggle Kandaaa~ ugh. I fell in love with him all over again >.<;
I never thought about Kanda's name that way. But now that you mention it... Wah.. Do you think it has anything to do with Kanda insisting people call him 'Kanda' and not 'Yuu'? Before, we always assumed that it's just because he didn't want to be too familiar with others, but maybe there's more to it...
About the core memories, I get the impression that it's from someone and else and not whoever Kanda was before the experiment. Coz the hand that was in his dream was bigger than Kanda's small ones, I think it belonged to an adult... So maybe they implant this person's memories into Kanda (and maybe the rest of the test subjects as well) coz when that old man who ordered to freeze Kanda up (I forgot the name) heard about 'Yuu' halucinating and seeing the core memories, he was like '..like those children years ago' or something...ne?
So maybe, this mysterious woman is someone the person in Yuu's dreams love, so the memories is from this person's POV, and now that Kanda possesed the memories, it's almost like it's from Kanda's POV. And I don't know why she knows about the lotus, and... GUH! I want explanations! >.<
The order is MEAN! And I still wanna know why Kanda was a test subject. Where did they pick him up? Why chose him? Was he 'created' and thus not actually human, or was he human but they 'altered' him and erased his former memories? Huhu... Me wants the next chapter...
Aah, yes, the last image is just... *dies* aww, Kanda...
I'm wondering about this 'ai' too... Maybe the person whose memories become the core memories for the test subjects named Ai? Or because it's 'love'? Or both? Hawhaw...
And now we know why in chap 182, Kanda tried so hard to snap Allen back to himself when he's about to turn Noah. Because he doesn't want to have to kill another 'friend', and even if he didn't kill Allen, God knows what the order would do to him.
Aww, Kanda... He's probably been protecting Lenalee too, ne, by 'hiding' her from Leverrier. And that's why he never asked Lenalee a thing; he already knew what the order is capable of doing...
Hawhaw.. Ficcies would be loved, yes! But I still don't have PC and I haven't heard from my beta for my 2nd chap T.T
Why don't you write something? With a bit more fluff so Kanda wouldn't suffer too much? *nudge nudge wink wink* :D
no subject
Date: 2010-02-06 07:20 pm (UTC)We've been all nervous about this woman, coz we doubted about this love confession (like, 'WTF, who the heck Yuu's in love with!?'). And your version (about Kanda possessing memories of someone else, like Allen) sounds so awfully true and wonderful, that now I'm completely relieved! <3 Now it's like 'how could I be so blind not to understand it!?' *completely happy*
And about little!Allen, he also looked much like Kanda with his ponytail xDD Yeah, they are so similar that I can't understand those who don't realize it! >_<
(As for similarities between Allen and Alma, it'll be in the manifesto ^__^)
no subject
Date: 2010-02-07 05:24 am (UTC)Yeah, I mean, Kanda doesn't even know that woman, right? And I doubt little Yuu even understand what love is. And that old man said something about Yuu seeing the 'core memories' so it's gotta be that, right? :D
And yes li'l Allen is so much like Kanda <3
Can't wait to get involved
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